the vanessa monologues

Week 3 was a lot of the same stuff, different week for BB17. Vanessa and Austin won the HOHs, and since they were pretty much on the same page, it really didn't matter who was dethroned. Austin nominated Meg and Jason (I actually had to go look that up) and Vanessa nominated James and Perpetual Pawn Johnny Mac. Once again JMac was asked/told to throw the BOB. Early on Vanessa was all about booting James because he had "lied" to her about when he decided to go after Jace week 1.

John didn't technically have to throw the BOB because James sucked so royally at it that they never stood a chance. It was so bad that a lot of them actually thought James was throwing it out of some sort of showmatic love for Meg. In any case they lost, and then it became all about the POV. Audrey's name was drawn, and Vanessa had this beautiful dream of Audrey winning and giving Vanessa the perfect out for not putting Audrey up. But that didn't quite come together, and Austin ended up letting John win, because Austin had his own dream of Jeff going out the door.

Just like last week, there was a brief interlude of insanity by suggesting that maybe Johnny Mac was a complete idiot and he could be talked into not saving himself. He gave the same answer as last week, that it would look suspicious. That's a great answer because it shuts them up, but in truth it's just that he's not a moron. Despite what they all think.

So now Vanessa knew she'd have to put up a replacement. For some reason she had it in her head that she needed just cause to nom someone. So she came up with this incredibly intricate plan where Austin would start an argument with Jeff, and get him to say something about an alliance that Vanessa could then turn around and use as empirical evidence that Jeff was untrustworthy. The fight went off without a hitch and then Vanessa launched into three days worth of the Vanessa Monologues where she retold the story of why Jeff Has To Go to each HG in increasing detail. I think her top time was 90 minutes.

Before long Jeff was on the block and noticing that though he supposedly had an alliance with just about everyone in the house, almost no one was going to vote for him to stay. Jackie had his back, of course, which just convinced the rest of them that there was some sort of TAR twist where they'd get more money if they both stayed in the house. John pulled out another Dan BB10 card and openly acknowledged that he was going to vote for Jeff out of loyalty, even though there was no chance of him staying.

About this time Liz, who had been Julia all week, cycled back into the house. Jeff pulled her aside and told her he knew she was twins. Austin saw them talking and flipped the fuck out, proving that his targeting of Jeff really was all about Liz. The Twin Twist continues to be comedy gold as literally everyone in the house knows they're twins, but the vast majority of them are pretending not to, at least in "public." And the twins know they all know, but are still playing dumb.

Audrey started her weekly cycle of preparing to throw a hinky vote and seemed to be lining things up to pin it on Steve. When the liveshow rolled around, we got an actual twist when Audrey voted to evict Jeff, and Steve did in fact vote to evict James. Then as an added bonus Liz voted to evict James. There's some speculation that she just said the wrong name, but who knows. In any case it's set everyone on a whirl and that's always fun. Personally I'm hoping that Liz didn't even tell Julia how "they" voted. Right now almost no one suspects her and the paranoia is running rampant.

Anyway, Jeff walks the plank, and the rest of them toddle out to play HOH in a '90s style watch the dance and answer true/false questions. They all suck so bad at it that the comp ends after 3 questions, and Liz and Shelli are left standing as HOHs. I'm afraid we're now in for a re-run of week 2. But there's always hope that something different will happen.

Oh, and there were Gronk parties this week. I totally forgot. Great twist guys.